I’ve only attended two baby showers in my entire life.  In my circle of friends we are a curiously childless lot.  Only Steve Gould and Laura Mixon, and Daniel and Kat Abraham have children.  All the rest of us skipped that mile post in a life.  Most of us married, but few of us bred.

Seeing the tiny shoes, and colorful socks, and a snuggy that will make the baby look like a tiny polar bear I could see the attraction of holding and guiding that tiny life.  It’s so strange to look at Berkley with her pregnancy enlarged body, and realize that in just a few weeks there will be a new person joining the 7 billion already on the planet.

There was also something rather tribal and evolutionary about the moment.  It was a room filled with women.  Most of my closest friends are male.  I have worked in predominately male dominated professions so this was strange for me.  I had this sudden image of women gathered around a campfire 10,000 years ago bringing useful items to the soon-to-be mother.

Perhaps it was because my father raised me as his second son, and because I never wanted or had children, I felt removed from the circle.  I felt like I needed to be circling the perimeter guarding, making certain everyone was safe.

I also found myself thinking about customs and rituals in a new paradigm.  What does a baby shower look like for a male gay couple?  

Do men fall prey to “baby lust” in the same way women do?  Is it a different emotional reaction that drives them?  I had a brief moment of “baby lust” in my late thirties, but I had a horse breeder’s interest.  What would the child look like?  Would it have musical ability?  Like horses?  Love to read?  I also had this brief desire to leave a mark on the world, to not go down into darkness without leaving a part of myself behind.  Then I realized that I have written books, and a couple of television episodes that probably do represent a legacy, and I was content.